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Haters Back Off!

“Everybody looks like somebody to you,” my husband often comments. It’s true. After doing hundreds of portraits over the course of my artistic career, my eye just sorta picks up on certain peculiarities. Because I’m a news junkie many of my comparisons are with political figures.

That guy looks like Mr. Potato Head. Hey look, his mouth works like a puppet. She totally looks like a manicured poodle! Don’t you think President Trump looks like an eagle?

Once I make a comparison in my head, I have a difficult time separating the two. For example, every time I see or hear “AOC” I see and hear “Miranda Sings.” Tell me you don’t see the similarity! It’s not just their looks and voices. They’re both self-made and self-absorbed. The characters they’ve created are sheer genius. They’re popular and intriguing. They’re narcissistic and egotistic. They love to post videos of themselves and are extremely trend-savy. They’re not only melodramatic but they’re great actresses. There are no conditions—no, not a one where either would pass up a chance to be in the spotlight.

You might think this is mean spirited. If so, you haven’t witnessed the political arena lately. I’m guessing witness protection without any media access? In that case, I can tell you that I’m meek and mild in contrast. Let me show you what I see from my vantage point (or should I say advantage point—I’m white.) As far as I can see, none of the upcoming 2020 presidential candidates have any vision at all, let alone 2020. Their politicking is nothing more than constant confrontation, name calling, and hostility—with the exception of one who lives in her own world of la la.

Let me paint you a clearer picture. It’s a lot like a high school election. Remember the back-stabbing reputation assaults? The outrageous promises? The craving for the 4 P’s (popularity, power, power and power.) The bribery, the name calling, the rumors, the snobbery, the stooping, the hypocrisy, the vengeance, the butt kissing or kicking, the soul selling? Well, this is high school on TPVRF, otherwise known as Thrust Propulsion Venom Rocket Fuel. Every day I think these antics can’t possibly get any worse but the madness continues to grow. Common Sense should be on the endangered species list before it becomes extinct like its cousins, Cooperation and Collaboration. Why can’t we all get along? If we can't be excellent to each other can we at least be civil?

Sometimes politics makes me so crazy my husband threatens to take me to the psych ward, AKA witness protection, AKA newscast de-tox. That seems like a good idea until I envision the doctor looking just like Chuck Schumer and Nurse Nancy Pelosi duck-clapping when it’s craft time. How about I just switch the channel instead, maybe watch a few episodes of Haters Back Off on Netflix. Yeah, good idea.

Hey, Miranda looks exactly like AOC! Arghhhh!