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January 24, 2020

As a political junkie I’ve been overdosing on the impeachment hearings.  It’s turned out to be a fantastic way to detox.  Watching Adam Schiff drone on and on, repeating himself for hours on end is as good a rehab program as it gets.  I think my craving to keep up on current affairs is definitely waning.  Sure, there are theatric attempts to keep me riveted but its tedious to hear the actors read the same script 1,276 times a day in a loop.  It’s bad enough to be lectured on how the American people are too stoopid to choose a President on their own at the ballot box, and certainly not qualified to put 2 and 2 together.  I may not be a genius but I’m pretty sure the answer is 22, like my Smith and Wesson.   

As a writer I relish a good story line.  I hungrily devour movies featuring actors who skillfully portray their characters.  Although politicians and actors have a lot in common—they both live in a world of make-believe and crave fame and recog...

September 23, 2019

Halloween is super scary what with all those zombies, vampires, witches and goblins.  Even scarier are the sexy Bob Ross and Mr. Rogers costumes that are said to be all the rage this year.  But beware!  Dressing up as someone from a different culture is the most frightening of all—the mother-of-all-spookiness.  (I assure you there was no racist pun intended.) 

There are a lot of choices for Halloween costumes.  You can dress up as Queen Elizabeth, Donald Trump, Stormy Daniels, Bill Clinton, Monica Lewinski, JFK, Marilyn Monroe, James Comey, Adolf Hitler or Papa Smurf and nobody will bat an eye.  For that matter you can be a bat or an eye and nobody will, well… bat an eye. But impersonate Moana, Mulan or Aladdin (who are, by the way, ficticious figures) and you’re basically a horrible, hideous racist.  Ask Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.  And heaven forbid you mimic your favorite black sports hero or rock star—I’m not sure if that incl...

August 22, 2019

I’ve watched with interest the debate on reparations for the descendants of slaves, and it’s got me to thinking… even though I’m white (GASP!) I think I might be entitled to some compensation myself.  Here’s my case:

Some of my descendants were (GASP AGAIN!) Mormon.  History shows quite clearly that these people were seriously alphabetized!  Assaulted, Banished, Cursed, Detested, Expelled, Fabricated against, Gagged, Hated, Intimidated, Jeered at, Killed, Loathed, Molested, Negated, Ostracized, Persecuted, Quashed, Raped, Slaughtered, Taunted, and to top it off they were Unpopular, Victimized, Wronged, X-ed, Yelled at and Zapped   Ouch!  

Now, you might argue that I, myself haven’t experienced any of that—though I barely got through Jr. High School alive—nor have my parents, grandparents, uncles or aunts.  Still… I might have had many more opportunities had my ancestors been Catholic or Protestant.  Who can say?  On the other hand, if I were Jewish...

August 8, 2019

“Everybody looks like somebody to you,” my husband often comments.  It’s true.  After doing hundreds of portraits over the course of my artistic career, my eye just sorta picks up on certain peculiarities.  Because I’m a news junkie many of my comparisons are with political figures.  

That guy looks like Mr. Potato Head.  Hey look, his mouth works like a puppet.  She totally looks like a manicured poodle!  Don’t you think President Trump looks like an eagle?

Once I make a comparison in my head, I have a difficult time separating the two.  For example, every time I see or hear “AOC” I see and hear “Miranda Sings.”  Tell me you don’t see the similarity!  It’s not just their looks and voices. They’re both self-made and self-absorbed.  The characters they’ve created are sheer genius.  They’re popular and intriguing.  They’re narcissistic and egotistic.  They love to post videos of themselves and are extremely trend-savy....

October 1, 2018

Ever wish you could be a part of a society that’s not… to put this delicately… corrupt, scheming, ruthless, divisive and unethical?  I’m not saying my political views are always right, it’s just that… well, some political views are seriously jacked up.  (Who is John Galt?)

In the past, a thousand threads of opinion were woven into a rope sturdy enough to hold a hefty bulk of diverse ideals, tenets and viewpoints.  Our personal belief system was a right protected under the Constitution of the United States.  Now it seems our Constitution literally hangs by a thread.

When ‘emotion’ becomes an edict, replacing principles that have always been our nation’s strength, we’re in trouble. When the means justifies the end and the end is to gain power and control at any cost, we’re in trouble.  When the burden of guilt must be proved by the accused instead of the accuser, we’re in trouble.  When mob-mentality instead of bylaw can rule the day, we’re in trouble.  W...

July 6, 2018

I’ve always wanted to go to a wedding and yell out I object!  Well, not really.  I’ve seen it happen in movies but I’m not sure I could bring myself to disrupt something so sacred, even if I knew the bride and groom were making a big mistake.  But protesting is so fashionable—I kinda want to get in on the action.  Maybe I could find something more… respectful to protest.

Climb the Statue of Liberty on the 4thof July?  Naw, that’s already been done.  Besides, who am I to ruin the holiday plans of people who journeyed there to commemorate those who went through the grueling process of becoming a citizen of this great country.  You know, the tired and the poor—the huddled masses yearning to breathe free?  Those immigrants were true heroes that I’m guessing wouldn’t approve of my stunt to promote “butting-in-entry.”  

I could protest with Pro-choicers.  The right to choose is a noble cause.  A person should...

May 11, 2018

I doubt it started with Bathsheba but I bet it created quite a scandal.  The breathtaking bather (Alleluia) probably knew exactly what she was doing when she had repeated rendezvous with the rich and powerful. King David tried to shush the whole debacle by sending his lover’s husband (yeah, she was married) to the front lines to be killed in battle.  Definitely cause to appoint a special counsel.

In disparity to the Me Too Movement, we gotta include Catherine the Great’s betrayal of her husband, Czar Peter the Third.  Speaking of Me Too, Anne Boleyn had a pretty solid case against Henry the VIII, who was against level headed women, or rather, headed women.  

At least 14 U.S. Presidents, including Washington, Lincoln, Jefferson, Wilson, FDR, Cleveland, JFK, Clinton and Trump were, shall we say, less than pure.  And other prominent historic leaders such as Martin Luther King Jr., Generals McArthur, Patton, Petraeus and Napoleon all had a little something...

March 14, 2018

During the Opening Ceremony of the Olympics my husband remarked, “See, that American girl?  That’s Erin Hamlin, the four-time Olympic loser.”

“At least she tried!” I said in her defense.

He looked at me strangely, but that’s not in and of itself strange. 

“Erin Hamlin is a four-time Olympic winner,” he said.

“Make up your mind.”

“She medaled four times in the luge.  She’s a luger.”  He explained.

Oh, got it.  Kind of a big difference there.

I often wonder how many times we misunderstand each other, and I’m not just talking about our marriage. I know there are some colossal differences that are impossible to bridge.  Oil and vinegar, Israel and Palestine, Democrats and Republicans, Protestants and Catholics.  Of course, there are always a few exceptions.  When making a salad for example, oil and vinegar get along swimmingly, if only for a short time.  I’ve been to both Israel and Palestine and I know there are remarkable people on both sides of the isle that sometimes play nice.  Not sure I ca...

January 26, 2018

So, Patriots vs. Eagles.  Super Bowl 50 has me teetering on the fence.   I haven’t been able to form a healthy attachment to either team so far.  I know, what’s the fun in that?  But I’m working on choosing one and weighing my options:

Betting on a sure thing—if the team wins—gives one a respectable sense of superiority.  You knew all along what was what and how things were.  But there’s also something to be said about rooting for the underdog.  Besides giving someone else a shot at the victory dance and a piece of jewelry they don’t already have, wiping the smirk off a cocky Pats fan sounds appealing too. 

I need to make a decision one way or another because being neutral at a Super Bowl party just ain’t cool.  UNLESS, however, you happen to be the commentator.  Fans value play-by-play commentators for their articulateness and ability to accurately describe each play fairly and without bias.  Any sports announcer who projects personal preference w...

June 15, 2017

What’s the difference between an elected official and the average citizen?  I mean besides a first-rate healthcare plan, excellent pension, retirement, personal parking space, fame, power, respect and numerable other perks?   

It’s easy for ordinary people like me to complain.  Do they seriously need to take another recess?  Whatever happened to 9-5 hours and a two-week vacation?  Why don’t they dig in and get something done. They need to stop this outrageous bickering and contemptible finger-pointing and do the job they’re hired to do. Running the country is not about you, it’s about us, the people. That’s just for starters. I could go on all day and barely scratch the surface of my grievances.   

As much as I believe that government should play a very small role in our lives, the part it does play is extremely significant.  These representatives have a sacred responsibility to uphold the Constitution of the United States for all of us regular corn-fed folk.  If you...

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